Feelings: Zoli

Sister Willie’s wonderful testimony last Sunday stirred up something in me that I had meant to share for a while, and then, something Pastor John said towards the end of the meeting about feelings, reaffirmed that it would be good for me to share it, so here it is.

The first real experience I received from God happened to me 24 years ago. It was a dream, or something like a dream that felt very much like reality. It was so real that before I went to bed I was an unbeliever, but when I woke up, I just knew, in every fiber of my being, that God did exist, that He was real.

In this dream I was taken to a place that I believe, to this day, was heaven.  The only way I can at least try to describe it is, it was as if I was standing on an ocean shore, and waves of the most wonderful, heavenly feelings kept washing all over me and penetrating my soul through and through.  I was feeling perfect love, perfect happiness, perfect peace…  But, and I want to emphasize this, I can’t remember seeing anything.  The only element that I have ever been able to recall from this dream is the feelings I was feeling in it.  And this is something I had never thought of before, until very recently.

I am now realizing that it is no accident that in my very first experience with God, the only thing He gave me was feelings.  Through that glorious experience, God put an imprint on my soul, and in the years and decades that followed, even though I never realized it, I was actually looking for a place where I would find that THING that God so graciously allowed me to feel for a moment.  I started going to church, because I wanted to meet that God who gave me those feelings.  I decided to get water baptized because I wanted to get closer to THAT God.  I went to Bible College because I believed that by doing so, I would learn more about THAT God, who allowed me to feel something from His perfect love and His glory.  And then, when I left my church and started attending another church, where they put more emphasis on the holy Ghost, I did it because I was looking for something that would match those feelings I was feeling back in 2000. 

Having been listening to Pastor John’s teachings for a while now, I now know that it was by God’s design and in His wisdom that He didn’t allow me to see anything in that dream; He only gave me feelings.  This quote from Hebrews came to mind recently: “For you have not come to a mountain that can be touched.”

It is not through our eyes or any of our earthly senses that God is leading us, because “things that are seen [or can be touched] are temporal, but things that are not seen [or cannot be touched] are eternal.”  As I am now pondering over this, Paul’s words come to mind, when he said that even tongues (something we can hear) will cease (1Cor 13:8); and as Pastor John put it in The Sound of the Spirit booklet: even the sound of new birth comes with a “familiar feeling”, that is how we know it’s the real thing, and not fake. 

The truth that Pastor John teaches, the lives his ministry have produced over many decades, the fruits it is producing in my own life, and the feelings God gives me EVERY SINGLE DAY as I’m walking in the truth, are the reason I know, deep down in my soul, that I don’t need to keep searching.  I just KNOW it!  In recent weeks I was having the same thought a number of times: “It doesn’t even make sense that anything but THIS would be the truth.”  Or as Peter and Uncle Joe put it: “This is that!”

I LOVE listening to Sister Willie’s testimonies!  I have listened to the one she shared last Sunday twice now, and both times I was in tears, but they were tears of happiness and gratefulness.  I am a happy man, and inexpressibly grateful for the grace God has poured out upon my life.  Oh, the privilege of having the feelings that I have and an understanding of the truth that has been given to so few, even among God’s own people!  Oh, that the goodness of God would lead me to repentance if there are still things in my life that I need to repent for.  May His blessings and His love drive me further and further down the road of humility; may I never be puffed up by the wonderful things He’s done and keeps doing for me.

God bless you all!

Zoli

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Montanus Reading

Pastor John,

I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate the work and time you have put into your new book about Montanus. Each time we get together and read a draft of what you are working on, it gets clearer and clearer how much Christianity was and has not ever been form God. Not only that Christianity was never from God but also that there have been great men and women like Montanus who have had no part with it.  

It makes me hurt for God’s people, the culture we live in today here in the west is dominated by Christianity. Even if you have never been to a Christian church, it has affected your life in some way. It is a lie and I hate it more and more all the time, only because so many of God’s own children are giving their life to it, not understanding that the one who bought them is not in there. I hope and pray that the work God has given you and us reaches every person He wants it to. 

It reminds me of this scripture in Hosea 4-6 “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge:” I hope that any of God’s children that read the work he has given to you that is helps them gain knowledge to understand who they really are and gives them the strength to “Come out of her my people.”  None of His people belong in that filthy thing called Christianity.  Thank you, John!!

Stuart

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Montanus Reading

I am really enjoying this Montanus reading.  I asked earlier what order this book will be in the Iron Kingdom series because it’s doing such a good job of driving home the point of every other book in the series, so far.  It covers slander, Paul’s gospel, Christianity, the Apostates, etc.   You can feel that familiar Christian spirit and the absurdity in everything Montanus’ accusers were saying, contrasted with the love and the relief and the right spirit in Montanus’s responses.  I just loved it.  It was very plain and easy to follow.

It struck me that this was not only some dialogue that took place centuries ago, but we have actually lived through and witnessed first-hand those same kinds of slanderous accusations against you (us), and your responses have been very similar to what we read from Montanus (the same spirit).  I know you begin the book with your personal experience in dealing with the slander and accusations from the newspaper article, (I love that introduction), but I wonder if you might add at the end (or somewhere), a few of the accusations that have been railed against you in the past, along with your response to those accusations, as a way to show that you are writing about a history that still exists.  I don’t know if you want to dredge any of that up, but it certainly goes with what we just read tonight.

Wow!  Jesus is helping you defeat that ol’ anaconda!  I am happy for you!

Lee Ann

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Montanus Reading

I’m so glad that I could be there tonight to hear chapter two. You always have a way of bringing things to life!  Many of the accusations were so ridiculous that you can’t help but to think of some of the similar accusations that have been said of you/us.  If not the same, then of the same spirit!

Hope you sleep well ( and long!) tonight. Thank you again!

Carrie

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Hey Pastor John,

Last night I re-read the copy of the first chapter of the Montanus book that you sent out.  It was so good!  What an honor to be a part of what Paul was preaching, what Montanus was preaching and now you.  After I read it I thought, “Jesus, I can’t believe you have let me hear this, see this and love this!”  I was so overwhelmed.  All I could feel was, I’m showing you (us) who you are!  With everything we are learning, it seems nothing has changed. There has always been someone passing the truth along and very few who follow.  I feel humbled and honored to be following the truth, that is a gift from Jesus! 

Thank you for passing all you learn to us!  

Michelle

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From Leika – I Am Young, but …

Hi Pastor John, 

I pondered these recently and I thought to share them. John 10:14 – I am the good shepherd, and I know My sheep and am known by My own. I know that I am young, but I am serious about my faith. I even left my church family for truth because Christianity is not from God. God is not three in one. The wrong doctrines of Christianity have. We need to be baptized with the Holy Ghost to be born again and not in water. All of those are the reasons why I left the church. It took a lot of courage to do that, but God has been faithful. Along the way was not easy but I kept on. 

I met different people and opened my eyes to the reality of life that I never learned before. One of those was when I was a teacher. How other nationalities view Filipino people. One of my students said that Filipinos are easy to get because they are poor, and they go to other countries to make money. They do anything for money. I even encountered students who were very difficult to deal with having different personalities with no knowledge of God. Instead of being mean to them, I treated them right. As Corinthians 16:14 – Let all you do be done in love.  Romans 12:17-18: Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.

Those experiences deepen my relationship and total reliance on God. The more I know who He is and understand His word. I believe it’s not just me but also those who are his sheep. Our experiences shape us into who we are now. The Bible tells us in John 16:33 In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” It’s normal for believers to experience suffering and hardship. James 1:12 says: Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him. 

It’s clear to me now, It’s not about the church or group you belong but the question is. Does God know you? Do you know God? It’s about the person who experienced Ezekiel 36:26-27. We didn’t choose God, but God chose us (John 15:16). In the judgment day in Matthew 7:21-23:

“Not everyone that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity. “

I remember this verse in 1 Timothy 4:12 – Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.  

Thank you for your kindness.

Leika

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Beautiful, Leika.

A person who walks uprightly in integrity and godliness never has to demand respect from others.  One will have the respect of others when genuine integrity is there.  And you have ours, dear Leika.

Thank you for writing.

Pastor John

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El Salvador Election

Pastor John,

If I am quoting you right, you have said that unrest and chaos in the world will set the stage for the rule of the Beast from The Book of Revelation. 

Today I read that “El Salvador reportedly re-elected a man who has already arrested 1% of their entire population, without charges, to thwart gang violence.  It has been effective, and the people cheer him.  But they gave away their rule of law to be safe.”

The man may be right in what he has done.  I just noticed how similar this is to your description of the prophetic Beast bringing peace to a world that is upside down with disorder.  It will not necessarily be a good way to restore order, but I believe you said the people will embrace any version of peace because things will be so bad.

Jerry

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Hi Jerry.

Yes, the “Beast” is God’s name for that wicked man.  The world will call him something else, maybe something like “Savior”.  He will bring an end to the chaos on earth and set the nations in order, and he will seem to be a wise and good ruler (to men).  The whole world will marvel at him.

In the news, I have seen that the phrase going around now about that stern, re-elected El Salvadoran ruler is “the world’s favorite dictator.”  That’s the way it will be with the Beast.

Pastor John

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Montanus, Chapter 1

Pastor John,

Chapter 1 of your Montanus book is really good!  Thank you for sending it out!  Right now I’m in the middle of listening to this morning’s reading on Montanus.  It’s so fascinating.  I’m thankful for how clearly we can see the truth about Christianity and its rise.  It feels like the more we learn of its nothingness, the smaller and smaller of a hold it has on us.  I hope I can take it all in!

Samuel

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Pastor John,

Wow, I just listened to this morning’s audio.  Vince and I read Montanus this weekend because we wanted to really know where we are and where you are for tomorrow night.  And hearing your discussion this morning, and talking to you today, it was wow, we are on the same page!  I feel like I have had a “wow” moment after I read your writings on Montanus.  It has left a really good feeling in my soul.

I’m excited about this and praying for you and us all that we can be what Jesus wants us to be to carry this truth on.  I feel honored just to see what we are seeing about Montanus, and seeing what I see right now before our own eyes.  It’s amazing what you have gotten on paper to this point and that you are able to get across these feelings to us.  I’m loving Montanus, just like Paul, and you!  God is going to have someone standing in the gap for His people.

Amy B.

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“You Don’t Get Away with Anything”

Pastor John,

I just finished watching the Sunday morning meeting, which was wonderful, and towards the end you said something about God’s love that perfectly echoed an experience I had about a week ago. You said something along the lines of Jesus didn’t let his disciples get away with anything.”

I am right now in the process of reducing the amount of gastro resistant tablets I’m taking for my stomach issues, that is, I’ve started taking them every other day instead of one pill per day.  In the meantime, I’ve been learning that I still need to be careful (and apply self-control) about the kind and the amount of dishes I eat.

So, about a week ago I was getting ready to have lunch at my workplace, and I was looking at the selection in the dining room.  Among other things, you could choose a hamburger, as well as a hot-dog.  Just a hamburger or just a hot-dog seemed a bit less than necessary, so I started entertaining the idea of going with a hamburger AND a hot-dog.  A very still and gentle voice inside of me (that I later called the “spirit of a sound mind”) asked me, “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”  I had the thought that I could just choose a soup and a hamburger, but I brushed it off, and ended up going with the hamburger and the hot-dog. 
Well, both were indeed delicious, but 15-20 minutes later, I already started having that straining feeling in my stomach that signals when something is not right in there.  I knew, right away, that it was the consequence of making an unwise choice, even though God did give me a right thought at the time, thus, a chance to do what is good for my health.  I was thinking about just that when I went into the bathroom to wash my hands, and I heard this sentence in my mind: “You don’t get away with anything.”

If I was carnally minded, it could have sounded like a threat, but thanks be to God that I immediately felt and understood how much love was in these words.  I was thinking how thankful I should be that God won’t let me get away with anything because it’s a sign of His love for me.  The words from the book of Hebrews came to mind (as they do so often, praise God!):

“My son, do not lightly esteem the Lord’s correction; neither be discouraged by His reproof, for whom the Lord loves, He chastens, and He scourges every son whom He receives (…) But if you are without chastisement, of which all have been partakers, then you are bastards, and not sons.”

I also thought and had a glimpse of the feeling of terror for the people who get away with everything in this life.  Because that means they don’t even have a chance to repent, to change their ways, to change the way they think and the way they live their lives. 

Thank you, God, for your chastisement!  May we never grow weary or get discouraged by Your reproof, but consider it as a sign of Your love, that You are still treating us as sons and daughters.  And may we grow in wisdom, in holiness, in love, as You’re teaching us Your ways.

I hope you all are having a beautiful week.

Zoli

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Life and Death

Good morning Pastor John,

I just read something that you said in the Thought for the Evening (TFE), January 26.  I felt it when I read it.  It made me think of how many saw the dying condition I was in, prayed for a miracle, and then when God sent one, they hated it.  They would rejoice if that dead old girl was propped up in a pew somewhere, but they rejected the life Jesus brought me because they love death. 

That is something! 

What good and sound instruction this is from Jesus.  It is a relief and a comfort.  I love that about the truth. 

And I love you. I am thankful Jesus put me with you. You recently told of how when you were in sin, Jesus showed you that those around you were not better off for knowing you. That brings tears to my eyes even writing this because Jesus certainly changed that.  My soul has flourished under your care. I am only better for knowing you.  Jesus did that…for both of us.

Here is what you wrote in this TFE:

“Always remember this, anyone who does not love the truth loves death. They are blind. Do not follow them.”                                 

https://goingtojesus.com/gtj_thoughts.html?tname=tfe01-26

Beth D.
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Thank you, Beth.

I love you, too, and I am very thankful for this family that Jesus has put together.

Pastor John

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Communion

Dear John,

I wanted to take the time to write down the communion testimony Jesus blessed me with today. I felt too good today to try to tell it!

I received the baptism of the holy Ghost in October 1985, and I received it with joy. Over the next 11 years I would pray and talk to Jesus and he would touch me and give me beautiful testimonies. But like many who are in Christianity, I could not fully understand the depth of the blessing of being filled with the Spirit.

I had been taught that in order to have communion with Jesus, I was to partake of the communion ceremony that was performed at certain times during the year at church services when the congregation together received crackers and grape juice in His name. I loved doing that because I longed for communion with Jesus.

In 1996,  I was watching a Christian tv program which was telling about a famous missionary who had lived in Africa for many years. He loved Jesus so much that he would have communion every day; he set aside time each day to eat his crackers and drink his grape and spend special time with Jesus. He said it was available to anyone who desired communion to do that same thing. I wanted to do that, too, because I loved the thought of being able to have daily communion. Jesus used that program to touched my heart because he knew I desired real communion with him more often than just a few times a year. He was telling me I could have sweet communion with him every day!

I went to the grocery store and bought a small package of crackers and a small container of grape juice. From a sincere heart I told Jesus I longed for him. I put my crackers up on the top shelf of a kitchen cabinet and my juice in the back of the refrigerator. Each day for months  I would find a quiet time with Jesus when Tim was at work and baby Jeremiah was asleep. I would get my cracker and juice and talk to Jesus from my heart.

Throughout the fall of 1996, I had been asking Jesus to let me hear and recognize his voice. Tim had begun going to some of the home prayer meetings of the saints held at Pastor John’s house. Tim never put any pressure on me to go, but by the end of the year, I found myself telling Jesus that even though I had had some very hurtful experiences with church religion and those in authority there, I was willing to put all my eggs in his basket again and go with Tim to the home prayer meetings. And when I went I learned about true communion in the holy Ghost and the fellowship of the believers with Jesus.

Real communion is not in ceremony, but it is in Spirit and in Truth with the blood of Christ flowing from Jesus through the body to cleanse, strengthen and bring joy. He is the bread of life. And fellowship with Jesus and the body can be had anytime we yield ourselves to the power of God. Jesus did not suffer and die to institute a dead ceremony of passing out bread and juice, but he sent back the holy Ghost so we can have a real relationship with him, we can eat and drink of him, and live, and we can have perfect communion with him every day!

Love,
Bess

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